stephen r king
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tuesday 12:38am november nineteenth two thousand two

so, through some sort of unexplainable situation, I found myself going to work today at a large financial institution. which is mysterious, since I don't work at a large financial institution. in fact, for the past month, I've worked in my two-bedroom apartment in brooklyn. but yes, somehow this happened.

call me crazy, but I found some subtle differences between working alone in my apartment and working in the world headquarters of a large financial institution.

one difference is farting. I've been taking it for granted for the last month that my gasses were enjoyed by everyone I work with. but now, suddenly, in the "Real Working World" they have new rules and stuff. that's weird. so I have to watch out for that.

next: coffee. once noon swung around today and I was a complete mess, I realized that it's been nice being able to have as much coffee as I wanted, at any time I wanted. and it was good coffee. damn good coffee. somehow the corporate world doesn't place the same importance on quality of coffee, and how it affects their employees' productivity.

music. are you telling me that the entire world doesn't listen to music on headphones all day? this is ridiculous! someone saw my iPod and said "hey, is that one of those MP players?" what's going on out there?

windows. now, I refuse to believe that most of the world is using this operating system. I assumed that it was just something they used in europe, but I realize now that I may have been wrong. I kept getting pissed at things that don't work the way they should work, and menus that kept popping open when I tried to use my usual keyboard shortcuts in photoshop. and the constant crashing. what? you don't know where the DLL is? why the hell are you asking me? if you don't know where it is, there's not a chance in hell I do! and say you want to open something in photoshop, and photoshop is minimized, and you don't know if photoshop is on A:\, B:\, C:\, D:\, E:\, F:\, G:\, H:\, I:\ or YOURMOTHER:\? how about trying to drag the photoshop file over the photoshop button thing down in the task bar? that makes sense, right? well, then an error box pops up and says "you can't drag that onto the button thing. if you want to open it, drag it onto the button thing and hold it there. then the program will pop up and you can drag it into there." hey, instead of putting so much effort into writing that dialog box, how about making it so you can drag something into there? since obviously it crossed your minds that it was common enough to require a special error message!

wow, sorry about that. I lost control for a moment.

ok I'm better now.

so yeah, I've been working at a large financial institution. it's just temporarily, so I can have access to blahblahblah. in a sick and twisted way, it's been a bit of a refreshing change since rarely leaving my apartment in the last month. I'll be doing this for the next day or two. then it can be back to brooklyn, and I can once again say goodbye to things like "underwear" and "shaving."